The After
by checkpointcharlie127
Summary: We follow the bard Gabrielle on her journey through Germania. Somethings happened to Xena and she's determined to find her again. Post-finale. Rated T for now, possibly later M for violence and language.
1. The After

**Ok. while I have written hundreds of stories over time, this will be the first I have published to an actual writing website, so I am more than eager to hear responses. Rate/review=love! I do not own Xena or any of the characters, just the plot of this story, yadda yadda. Although I wish I did. ANYways, this first chapter is very brief, and is more just an introduction to the basics of the plot, Gabrielle as she is now, and the writing style I have chosen to use for this fic. I may come back and edit later, but for the sake of getting this up, here it is.**

She didn't scream anymore. At first, it would happen every night; she would awaken with an ear-splitting wail and continue to cry out until her voice had gone hoarse. But by now Gabrielle had grown accustomed to the dreams. Not that it was ever any easier to watch her beloved in Tartarus every time she was weak enough to succumb to sleep, but she had endangered herself and others enough times to be able to hold it in now. Now she just sat up, walked to the nearest stream, and waded in. The water was always like ice, but it reminded her she was no longer dreaming, and sharpened her senses. Tonight, as always, was one of those nights.

_She's never coming back to you, _the voice inside her soul reminded her. She hadn't been able to see Xena, or even hear her, since coming back to Germania. It had been almost a year.

"Shut up," she whispered. She didn't believe that. She couldn't believe that.

She pulled herself from the frigid water, pins and needles pricking her skin at the cold air. She had almost grown accustomed to the bone-deep exhaustion that had set in. It was like an extra weight, all she had to do was train hard enough, and it would be like it wasn't there. The fire, still burning merrily to itself, provided a small measure of relief, as did her shift as she pulled it over her head, settling back into the blankets. She rubbed her face with her hands and let out a breath, watching the puff of ice vapor swirl away. It was getting to be the time of year where she was going to need actual shelter or she would freeze, fire or not. Pushing that thought away, the bard brushed honeyed waves behind her ear, pulling out the same sheet of papyrus, her constant companion in this journey. It hadn't changed much over the last moon, just collected small observations about her dream, and analyses of the last thing Xena said to her.

_"Gabrielle, something's not right," said the warrior to her bard. "I've felt it since Japa, and it's done nothing but get stronger. I need to," and nothing. The air went silent, and the space inside her mind that Xena filled was suddenly, devastatingly empty._

_"Xena? Xena cut it out, this isn't the time for joking." Gabrielle looked around, growing more frantic. It was midday, and the sun was high and bright despite the cold, but all the sun in the world couldn't illuminate the darkness Gabrielle suddenly felt in her heart. Tears clouded her vision and choked her, acid and bile burning the back of her throat. She knew then that she was alone, and indeed something had happened._


	2. A Girl With a Chakram

**OK kids, heres chapter 2! I know I said it would be longer than the last one, but this seemed like a poignant end to this chapter. Yay for flashbacks! Again, I own nothing but the plot, and rates/reviews=love! I might even have the next chapter posted tonight, so be ready! (Also I will be starting a Resident evil fic soon, so keep an eye out of that)**

_1 year earlier_

Gabrielle sat below deck, rubbing vigorously at that spot on her wrist. Her seasickness had come back with a vengeance now that she was more or less alone, and it was all she could do to choke down a few mouthfuls of tasteless miso she had procured from the seamen of Japa. Not that the cramped room she called her quarters helped, the walls shifting and creaking as the trade ship rode out the latest storm. A grunt issued from the blonde's lips as she attempted to stand only to be thrown back onto her small cot.

"Remind me this is the last journey I'm taking by boat."

"I think you've said that on every ship we've boarded," a familiar voice issued from the spare bit of empty space, and the bard jerked so hard in reaction that her knee collided with the wall adjacent her, and she let out a small cry of both surprise and pain. Her jade eyes were wide, and her hand flew to cover her gaping mouth. She didn't realize she would go crazy this quickly, but she supposed nothing could really surprise her anymore.

"Xena? Am I going crazy? I think I am. I lost you for good then I got on this boat, and it WON'T stop storming and I feel like ox dung and I'm tired and dirty and want to just FIND an inn and sleep for a year, and then maybe take a hot bath if I feel like it, and just sit and cry but I CAN'T cry anymore, and I miss you! I miss you so much and it feels like my world is falling in around itself. I just want to touch you, or look you in the eyes, or smell your hair but I CAN'T anymore and its killing me!" She chuckles to herself, "I would even settle for following you and Argo through the forest around Potidaea, trying to keep up and freezing every night until I found you."

"I know, Gabrielle. And I'm sorry. I wish this wasn't the way things had to be, but the only thing I regret of my decision is that it hurts you. On the upside, you're not going crazy, I really am here. I won't leave you, dead or not."

The bards right fist had found its way to her hair, and she whisked it through roughly before responding. "Can I see you?"

"Unfortunately, not right now. I think I will be able to be visible when the sun goes down, it feels like I'm stronger then."

"Have you been here the whole time? Since Japa?"

"Yes. It took some getting used to. I had to find myself and figure out how everything worked all over again, or I would have come to you sooner. It was intimidating, much like being a child again and learning how to walk."

"Xena?"

"Yes?"

"I love you."


	3. The Land of the Pharaohs

**Yay, chapter 3! I almost thought I wasn't going to get it up tonight. Buuut I pushed through, did some rather lengthy research (just to factcheck) and here it is. I make no guarantees that I will have anything up by tomorrow, but we'll see. As always, rate/review=love, and I own nothing but the plot, although I wish I did. And for those of you who are reading this, spread word! I love feedback, and the more readers I have the more feedback I will receive. Thanks guys :)**

"It's ironic, isn't it? That I lost you because the sun went down and now it's the time I most look forward to?" The blonde was above deck, leaning her forearms heavily on the rough wood of the railing. Her eyes were cloudy and rough, reflecting the conflict she still felt about Xena's passing.

"I suppose if you look at it that way. But in a way the night has always been a good time for us. Sitting at the fire, me sharpening my sword. You, talking about the events of the day and writing them down. Trying not to burn dinner."

"I never had that problem when I was cooking," Gabrielle smiled. It was a motion that didn't quite reach her eyes.

"Well we all know you were always better at that than I was."

"It's a surprise you were able to survive without me, even if my only contribution for the longest was the illusion of domesticity." The small smile Gabrielle wore fell, and her eyes hardened as she stood straight, turning her back away from the endless waves and staring up at the sky. Thunder rumbled in the distance, and the tepid air moved gently in the hard silence. "We'll be to land soon. A week, maybe two. I'll pick up a horse when we port, and it should only be another 10 moons before we make it to the land of the Pharaohs. We have an invitation from their king."

"Remember, they have a different view of their rulers. They aren't just kings, they're Gods."

"How could I forget? Cleopatra was certainly full enough of herself to be a continuous reminder for the next few lifetimes."

Xena stepped forward, far inside Gabrielle's line of comfort, and if the bard closed her eyes she could almost feel her there, almost smell the clean scent of leather and smoke and warrior. Almost. The darker woman smiled, and Gabrielle swore she would never close her eyes as long as she could look at the warrior. She stared, memorizing every line and curve, and those eyes. "Maybe you're just jealous."

The blond smiled, a full, bright grin that lit the darkness more than the moon that peeked from behind thick clouds. "Maybe. But I will always have something that she never did."

"And what's that?

"Your heart."

Twelve days and relatively calm seas saw the warrior-poet safely to shore, and she sent up a prayer of thanks to Michael, the One God, Aphrodite and whoever else was listening. The port was relatively small, so her interaction with anything besides sand and anyone besides traders was minimal. Most were leery of her because of her strange dress, everyone in this area wore light fabric that covered a vast majority of their body and her short kimono and hakama were positively foreign. The katana and chakram didn't help matters. Despite the staring and murmurs that followed her throughout the sparse, sandy town, she was able to procure a room at the inn for a night, and a horse the following morning. Plenty of water skins were next on the list, followed by some dried fruit, bread, cheese, and olive oil. She made short order of that, and once again was at home on the road.


End file.
